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Thursday, February 12, 2015

WE ARE #1!!!!!

Es un secreto-- no les digo a casi nadie, pero somos 1--- ONLY 0 REMAINS-- I want to shout it to the world, but I know in my heart that I must wait.   Estamos tan cerca de conocerte.... we are so close to knowing our child, to being able to say "his"or "her" correctly..... to imagining a face when we talk about our little one.  We are close to being a complete family, and it is so many emotions all at once.  Really, it is hard to think at times, porque entras cada pensamiento y no quiero que te vayas de estos pensamientos.  I have to admit that I sometimes dream of how I will react when we get the call, and then my eyes start to water and I try not to get too attached to the dream, because I know that however it will happen... the moment will be perfect, and however it all unfolds is how it was meant to be.

Right now, we have been notified that we need to get our paperwork in order.  Some of the paperwork needs to be done so that they can present us to the committee that is supposed to meet in late November. The continuing education coursework (14.5 CEU credits) need to be completed so that we can accept a referral.  I don't think people understand how much all of this requires, I write a report on each class completed as well as take a test to earn a certificate.  Tomorrow, I will drive downtown to get our most recent homestudy with addendums and approval from the US government (I-171H) apostilled.  So, the US government will certify the validity of notarized paperwork that they need to have in Honduras to move forward with our case.  I am balancing and juggling this with a lot of other responsibilities at school.  In addition to teaching full time, I am tutoring on the side, preparing a schoolwide celebration of our school's diversity (complete with national speaker), working on my National Board Certification, and preparing to run the St. Jude Half Marathon.  Ninguna de estas actividades es tan importante como tú y me da cuenta de los muchos cambios que tienen que ocurrir antes de tu llegada.

It might seem like I should be OVERWHELMED-- but really, although I am busy, I am most OVERWHELMED by a sense of feeling BLESSED in everything.  We have a comfortable home.  I have a loving husband whose sense of silliness matches my own playful spirit.  I know that I am giving everything my best effort, and when the time is right, necessary things will change.  So many beautiful twists and turns in this journey make me appreciate that we are on the right path.  Yesterday, I went to a celebratory brunch for a friend who will soon be bringing her little boy home from Honduras.  She spoke of how God has shown himself in every detail and I feel that way too.  Today at church, unbeknownst to me that it would happen, the priest did a special blessing for expecting and adopting parents.  For the first time, I got to go forward and be a mama as he gave us his blessing.  Así ya tienes bendiciones encima de bendiciones.  It meant so much to me to be in that space and know that I don't have to worry about how things will unfold.

So, I am writing this quickly and saving it to be revealed later-- family does not know that we are this close-- not because we are trying to be sneaky and secretive, but because we want to relish giving them the biggest surprise!  A pesar de mi gran ilusión y mi gran deseo de conocerte, quiero que sepas también que yo sé que hay mucho que estás perdiendo.  Te estamos llevando a un lugar donde hay mucho frío.  Las personas que has conocido-- los vas a dejar.  Los sonidos, los sabores y los olores familiares van a disminuir en tu mente y vas a aprender un idioma diferente.  Hay muchos cambios que te esperan.  Y me da pena que tengas que pasar por estas dificultades.... pero te prometemos el calor de una familia para siempre.  Te prometemos una mamá y un papá que te van a cuidar, proteger y amar con todo nuestro corazón.... y voy a intentar, el máximo posible, guardar tu cultura e idioma.  Respetamos mucho la cultura de que vienes y queremos que veas esto.

Well, I am off for my run... still running towards Honduras... and hoping that the next you hear from me, it will be with happy heart and exciting news!  ALAS.... One is a WONDERFUL number, but ZERO is the one we are shooting for!

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